MYRONMAN HATES EVERYTHING

You know what, I have no clue why people talk on the phone while they are driving, but cab drivers are the worst.

I consider myself a pretty good/safe driver because people often wind up falling-asleep-without-a-care-in-the-world when they ride with me on long trips. I wasn’t always the kind of driver that made people trust me. I used to be the "my wife is about to vomit from car sickness" , or the "90 dollar moving violation" kind of driver.

I got to this point by realizing the kinds of things you should not do while you drive. That’s all fine and good for me, but I’m barely on the roads, so I’m not the person we need to be concerned about in the first place. We have to be concerned about the assholes that are going to fucking kill us all, worst of all those fucking cab drivers.

I call these guys assholes because they are breaking rules in an asshole-ish way. Here’s some ways you can tell they are being assholes when they drive.

They are:

1. talking on phone for the entire ride.
2. talking on phone when there’s a sign POSTED BY THE CITY that you should not talk on your phone for the entire ride.
3. talking on phone for the entire ride to the degree that the customer/rider has to give blow-by-blow instructions on where to go and how to get there.
4. talking on phone while honking at trucks that are trying to LEGALLY TURN.
5. talking on phone while honking at trucks that are trying to LEGALLY TURN while ILLEGALLY TURNING in front of them and to the right (in Chicago, it’s illegal to make a right turn IN FRONT of a large commercial vehicle/truck/bus/etc.).
6. talking on phone while telling customers how much the trip was.
7. talking on phone while giving customers change for their trip.
8. talking on phone while driving off from customer before they are fully out of the vehicle.

For these assholes I have only one question: Who the FUCK are you talking to?